Can you write a guide to dating black women, as a white man, and not have it be totally racist.?

That’s the question, are there ‘meta characteristics’ that define someone as black or white?

What is the dividing line between stereotype and a ‘cultural’ characteristic or preference. This is all NOT in any physical, external sense.

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Transitioning from abagond

I don’t know how much anyone reading this would know about abagond, another racially based posting board otherwise known as a ‘blog’ on wordpress, but I had been posting there very regularly from about 2011 or so until now.  I exagerate a lot of things, especially time and duration thereof, so it’s possible that was wrong.

Basically, I had been in a sense encountering ‘the black community’ from a sort of analytical perspective, since back in college, but only out on the west coast in LA.  My hometown was ‘hyperwhite.’  Then it was Mexican people and South American people in a different neighborhood and well it continues from there, but eventually I wound up in Reading, PA, and after certain occurences in my life wound up in the black community and have pretty much maintained that excepting for a few occassions. And Philly is a black town, still some Irish presence and the obvious Italian in South Philly.  But it’s mixed, with Spanish and Puerto Rican in North Philly here.

So, I’m trying real hard to find some relevant stuff to post on that doesn’t infuriate anyone!

stand by…

right now, it’s how to type and write and live in very close quarters with the wife and not get annoyed and somehow finish a paragraph with good spelling grammar and references!

where im at today

it’s hard for me, i have been an alcoholic since like i was 12, so have a nice day, lately i have been blacking out consistently with hard alcohol and so the alcohol has to go.  It’s every time the police are involved.

So I have that going on hence counting ‘days.’  Which I have to reset to 0 to align it with abstinence from marijuana.  This will provide a transparent and portable transition to NA meetings, which I surely need as well, for the purposes of a consistent timeline.

Meetings and mindsets vary across the country, the set I am reporting to every day now is geared towards passing the message of recovery on to new people and they are quite helpful.

So I have a lot of pressure to write, and getting more clear headed has certainly improved the quality and intelligibility of my words in person and on ‘digital paper,’ even.

It’s called the 5th step mine will be a summary, as opposed to the entire story called an autoethnography, and I am feeling extreme pressure to complete that project as well, all the time while working full time hours and going to meetings and trying to see my wife for some nice time together, it never ends, and that is not even including my kids, to whom I have become estranged due to running afoul of their mothers.

Hence the privacy issues of everyone involved, I’ll figure it out, give me a minute!

 

what we were like then what happened and what we’re like now

so when i started this relationship site, I found a pretty good idea, I thought, and that is as it states on the ‘subtitle’ that this is to provide support and encouragement where there may be little, and that is when you in a relationship with someone from another race.

There are a lot of issues that come up.

At that time, as well, I was taking a lot of drugs.  In the intervening years since I’ve typed anything here and gotten married, to a black woman of course (I’m white).  I have been thinking alot about the boundaries you can encounter when writing about real people who are alive, for both the purposes of respect and privacy in this increasingly intrusive society we must navigate.

So now I’m getting sober, marijuana has proved a real stumbler to quit, but I’ve had no alcohol for over 20 days.  And that is my main problem.  I have been honing my writing skills; but this place is a mess.  Stay tuned and say something if you wish.  Have a blessed day!

-tc