where im at today

it’s hard for me, i have been an alcoholic since like i was 12, so have a nice day, lately i have been blacking out consistently with hard alcohol and so the alcohol has to go.  It’s every time the police are involved.

So I have that going on hence counting ‘days.’  Which I have to reset to 0 to align it with abstinence from marijuana.  This will provide a transparent and portable transition to NA meetings, which I surely need as well, for the purposes of a consistent timeline.

Meetings and mindsets vary across the country, the set I am reporting to every day now is geared towards passing the message of recovery on to new people and they are quite helpful.

So I have a lot of pressure to write, and getting more clear headed has certainly improved the quality and intelligibility of my words in person and on ‘digital paper,’ even.

It’s called the 5th step mine will be a summary, as opposed to the entire story called an autoethnography, and I am feeling extreme pressure to complete that project as well, all the time while working full time hours and going to meetings and trying to see my wife for some nice time together, it never ends, and that is not even including my kids, to whom I have become estranged due to running afoul of their mothers.

Hence the privacy issues of everyone involved, I’ll figure it out, give me a minute!



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